To Be Or Not To Be: A Tribute To A Mother's Love

I recently crossed another annual milestone, as another birthday came and went, and I turned 48. It was my second birthday without my mother, and I certainly thought about her a lot and missed her beyond words.

My mother's elder sister - who is now 90 and a very warm, spirited, and lively 90 at that - reminded me of a touching story that brought tears to my eyes, and made me remember my mother ever so much.

Back in 1972, my parents had two children, and they wanted to have a third. My mother used to say she wanted to have three children because if two of them ever fight, the third one is always there to mediate! So there I was, inside her tummy, and on my way into this earth! 

It, however, turned out to be a very complicated pregnancy, because my mother had a lot of health complications, and there was a threat to her life. A lot of well-wishers felt that she shouldn't go ahead with her pregnancy, because she may not make it. Someone close even told my father "So you want three children, but without their mother!"

A decision was taken that the pregnancy needed to be terminated, because the risk to my mother's life was far too great. My mother's elder sister came from Patiala to Delhi to be with my mother during the procedure. My mother was taken to the army hospital, because her brother was a senior army doctor, and the army hospital was reputed for its brilliant doctors.

My mother was wheeled into the operating theatre, while my aunt waited outside for the procedure to be completed. Five minutes later, she was wheeled out again. My aunt was very surprised that the procedure had been completed so quickly. The doctor said that was not the case. My mother had actually broken down and told the doctor that she didn't want to lose her baby, and wanted to go ahead with her baby at any cost. The doctor had said he would dig deep and try his best to ensure a safe delivery, safe for my mother, and safe for the baby inside. He told my aunt that he could deal with a patient having physical problems, but he was not capable of dealing with someone who was psychologically broken!

My mother went ahead with the baby, and here I am, telling the story almost half a century later. My heart longs for my mother and remembers her with nothing but love, respect, and gratitude, for having loved me so much even before I was born. For having loved me so much that she was even willing to risk her life in order to have me.

Only a mother could do that for her child! My mother did that for her child!

Love you Mama. I owe my entire existence to you!

My mother in 2010, at the age of 75