I lived in Vienna from 1985 to 1989 and was there from the age of 12 to the age of 16. I went to Vienna International School, and was there from Grade 7 till Grade 10. By all accounts, those should have been among the happiest days of my life. I was living in one of the most beautiful cities in the world. My father was the Indian Ambassador, and we lived in a huge, palatial house, with a wonderful, large garden in a beautiful part of town. I went to a school which had amazing infrastructure in terms of academics, and sports facilities, plus the faculty was world class. Vienna was a safe city, and with the wonderful public transport system it had, I found freedom and independence like never before.
However, those four years were unfortunately the toughest years in my life, and left indelible scars. I was subjected to constant racial bullying in school, whether it was about Indian accents, or Indian food, or Indian customs, or about my religion. It wasn't as if it was being done by a single individual. It was rampant, and it was on a daily basis. Yes, I didn't have an American or a European accent, but why should I have had that? I was an Indian, and this was an international school with over 70 nationalities, so it should have been tolerant towards different cultures and mannerisms and accents. Every time I spoke, there would be a bunch of kids mimicking me in the accent of Peter Sellers' character of Hrundi V Bakshi from "The Party".
Before coming to Vienna, I was a confident little fellow. I had just come from Belgrade, where I had spent 2 of the happiest years of my life, though even there, I studied in an international school. I came from a loving family, and was very close to my parents and my 2 sisters. But the racial bullying had a very adverse impact on me. I lost confidence in myself and in my identity. I became withdrawn and very conscious about something as basic as communication. Before saying anything, I would pause and think about whether I was saying it in the correct accent, and whether I would be laughed at. It effected my performance, my effectiveness and my leadership skills. My defence mechanism became that I would make fun of myself before anyone else had a chance to do so. The only possible silver lining was that I found myself becoming very tolerant.
I am not saying that all those who constantly made fun were necessarily racist, and had vile intentions in mind. They were just a bunch of fun loving kids from Europe and the Middle East, who were having a laugh at someone's expense without having the maturity to realise the damage they were causing. For them it was probably just banter, and they were doing it for fun. My sense of self pride was too high for me to ever make a huge deal out of it and complain to the school authorities. But I lived with the scars for years, even after I moved back to India. My self confidence was dented. I became very self conscious because I felt people would laugh at me. Nah, this isn't anything anyone should have to go through. It's not just racial bullying, but any kind of bullying that can leave scars. The one advice that I can give people who are at the receiving end of such bullying is to make a noise about it and report such incidents to the concerned authorities. Putting up with it quietly can lead to personality changes and can leave scars that take years to recover from.
Over the years, travel has become a passion like no other I have had before, and I've had my share of passions in every stage of my life. Europe is probably the continent that I most enjoy, because of its rich history, amazing architecture, breathtaking natural beauty, delicious cuisines, and honest, professional people. But ask me if I ever want to live there, and the answer will be no, because I don't ever want my son to go through the kind of racial bullying that I went through. Yes, India has its share of problems, but here we are accepted, we have a sense of belonging, and we are not outsiders. The world has come a long way since the time I lived in Vienna 3 decades ago, and I like to believe it's a much more open and tolerant world and perhaps this wouldn't happen in today's world, but I'm quite happy living in my own land!
However, those four years were unfortunately the toughest years in my life, and left indelible scars. I was subjected to constant racial bullying in school, whether it was about Indian accents, or Indian food, or Indian customs, or about my religion. It wasn't as if it was being done by a single individual. It was rampant, and it was on a daily basis. Yes, I didn't have an American or a European accent, but why should I have had that? I was an Indian, and this was an international school with over 70 nationalities, so it should have been tolerant towards different cultures and mannerisms and accents. Every time I spoke, there would be a bunch of kids mimicking me in the accent of Peter Sellers' character of Hrundi V Bakshi from "The Party".
Before coming to Vienna, I was a confident little fellow. I had just come from Belgrade, where I had spent 2 of the happiest years of my life, though even there, I studied in an international school. I came from a loving family, and was very close to my parents and my 2 sisters. But the racial bullying had a very adverse impact on me. I lost confidence in myself and in my identity. I became withdrawn and very conscious about something as basic as communication. Before saying anything, I would pause and think about whether I was saying it in the correct accent, and whether I would be laughed at. It effected my performance, my effectiveness and my leadership skills. My defence mechanism became that I would make fun of myself before anyone else had a chance to do so. The only possible silver lining was that I found myself becoming very tolerant.
I am not saying that all those who constantly made fun were necessarily racist, and had vile intentions in mind. They were just a bunch of fun loving kids from Europe and the Middle East, who were having a laugh at someone's expense without having the maturity to realise the damage they were causing. For them it was probably just banter, and they were doing it for fun. My sense of self pride was too high for me to ever make a huge deal out of it and complain to the school authorities. But I lived with the scars for years, even after I moved back to India. My self confidence was dented. I became very self conscious because I felt people would laugh at me. Nah, this isn't anything anyone should have to go through. It's not just racial bullying, but any kind of bullying that can leave scars. The one advice that I can give people who are at the receiving end of such bullying is to make a noise about it and report such incidents to the concerned authorities. Putting up with it quietly can lead to personality changes and can leave scars that take years to recover from.
Over the years, travel has become a passion like no other I have had before, and I've had my share of passions in every stage of my life. Europe is probably the continent that I most enjoy, because of its rich history, amazing architecture, breathtaking natural beauty, delicious cuisines, and honest, professional people. But ask me if I ever want to live there, and the answer will be no, because I don't ever want my son to go through the kind of racial bullying that I went through. Yes, India has its share of problems, but here we are accepted, we have a sense of belonging, and we are not outsiders. The world has come a long way since the time I lived in Vienna 3 decades ago, and I like to believe it's a much more open and tolerant world and perhaps this wouldn't happen in today's world, but I'm quite happy living in my own land!
In all fairness, I have to make one clarification so that I don't paint an exaggerated or distorted picture. My school in Vienna had some absolutely wonderful kids, and I formed several good friendships there. It's just unfortunate that a bunch of people started this racial bullying and before I knew it, a lot of people were having fun at my expense with racially oriented jokes. A majority of them were just having fun and had no malicious intentions - I guess they had no idea about the impact on me. Yes, a small minority were certainly downright nasty and made my life miserable, but I guess kids of that age don't have the maturity and sensitivity to understand the full impact of their actions.
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